15th July, 2012
Q: I am a 14-year-old girl and I like to talk to myself. After school I will be in my room talking to my favourite doll about what happened in school.
I have been doing this for two years. At times I also talk to the poster of my idol in my room.
Sometimes I feel lonely. My brothers are studying abroad, while my father is always busy with work.
Most of the time, I am at home with my mother who is preoccupied with her friends and hobbies.
If I am doing homework, it’s alright. But if there is no homework, I will start talking about my family life usually to the poster.
In school they say talking to oneself means the person has some problems. I don’t know how true and I don’t know what my problems are.
What I do know is that I feel neglected by my family. They are just too busy with their own things to notice me.
At times I worry about my studies because I am not good in it, even though I am good in drawing.
My father calls me stupid whenever I show him my report card.
A: When you are unhappy about something, it is always advisable to turn to those who can help. Your own parents and teachers are the ones you can rely on.
If you find it easier to relate to your mum, make time with her to talk to her. Unless you bring your problems out in the open, she will not guess you have worries. She probably thinks you are studying when you keep to your room talking to yourself.
You can start with helping her out in the house, after you have done your homework. You will find that doing things together encourages the sharing of thoughts.
Explain to her how defeated you feel about studies when you cannot meet the expectations of your father.
You can discuss school work with your form teacher. She/he will know whether you need extra help.
Often people are actually thinking aloud when they are talking to themselves.
But it is a problem when you only talk to yourself. It shows that you don’t have friends.
Why don’t you try being a friend first, so that you can make friends? You cannot expect people to be friendly unless you meet them halfway.
Please do not think of making friends, something as natural as eating rice in a teenager, as a problem. I am sure you have friends in school.