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20th July, 2008
Q: We are colleagues. He promises me many times that he would leave his girlfriend of five years for me. But he never did. He lies to me all the time.
Recently he went travelling with his girlfriend and yet claimed he went alone. He even called back from their holiday destination to say he loves me.
He said he would marry me but in actual fact he has already bought a house to prepare for his wedding with his girlfriend.
Last week he also got a promotion. Everything is going on so well for him while I suffer.
I have never hated anyone before. But I really hate him now. I wish he is dead.
ST
A: When we are being taken for a ride consciously by someone we love, we wholeheartedly wish he dies immediately. If he should do that, we tell ourselves we won’t even shade a drop of tear. All we are thinking about is he deserves it.
We believe that only when he dies our hatred could be buried and gone.
However, the truth is the day will come when we wish he is still alive. Because if he is dead, how would he get to witness how happy and fortunate we have become?
The best revenge is neither to destroy him nor destroy ourselves but to be happier and more fortunate or prosperous, what they say, doing well and living well.
When he sees you are doing better than him, you overtake him and more prosperous than him, he would probably feel worse than dying.
Instead of wishing him dead, it’s more advisable to watch him live to feel the jealousy and anger while you prosper.
For you, nothing good would come out of his death. When he is alive, you would guard yourself never to fall into the trap of such a man again.
It isn’t necessarily a bad thing to have met a jerk, cad etc because without experiencing one, you would not appreciate what a good man is.
What more such a heartless bloke is not worth wasting your time to plot revenge against. To curse him dead also lower your taste. Letting him go is also letting yourself go. Remember it as a lesson learnt.
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